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Humor Joke 幽默笑話

中國日報網英語點津為您精選語言地道的英語笑話，開心學英語。

頭回開出租

2009-07-13 09:19
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus.

怎么掙大錢

2009-07-10 10:23
I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents.

我能弄死它么

2009-07-09 09:44
"Mommy, my turtle is dead," the little boy, Myrddin, sorrowfully told his mother, holding the turtle out to her in his hand.

舉手太麻煩

2009-07-08 10:46
A site foreman had ten very lazy men working for him, so one day he decided to trick them into doing some work for a change.

如數奉還

2009-07-07 11:00
A man walks into a bar one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer. "Certainly, sir, that'll be 1 cent."

希望是個弟弟

2009-07-06 10:38
Johnny: She is all right. But I wish she had been a boy. Willie Smith just got a new sister, and now he'll think I'm trying to copy him.

家庭問題

2009-07-03 09:09
Two men, one American and an Indian were sitting in a bar drinking shot after shot.

你的馬來電話了

2009-07-02 09:51
A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan.

如此炫耀

2009-07-01 10:03
A young Air Force Lieutenant had just arrived at the Base in Japan. He’d been given a beautiful office and had it furnished with antiques.

我想把他晾干

2009-06-30 10:39
Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day while they were walking by the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end.

我媽來了么

2009-06-29 09:58
When I finally entered the house, I called out."The woman who loves you the most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield."

只有我能讀懂

2009-06-26 10:04
Well, my writing is so strange that only I can read it , and if I have to travel a long way to read your letter to your wife , it will cost you a lot of money.

沒領帶不讓進

2009-06-25 09:11
A man was crawling across the desert dying of thirst, when a camel raced up and stopped.

請把狗的尾巴割掉

2009-06-24 09:36
"Because my mother-in-law's arriving tomorrow, and I don't want anything to make her think she's welcome."

僅此一次

2009-06-23 10:05
Mr. Henry Beecher entered Plymouth Church one Sunday and found several letters awaiting him.

車壞了

2009-06-22 09:10
A child came in exclaiming excitedly, "Dad, I got a bicycle from Mom! Do you want to see it?" Dad said, "Sure, sure!"

他會跟來的

2009-06-19 10:17
One evening Mr. and Mrs. Taylor were making plans for the baby's arrival. "This house won't be big enough for us all when the baby comes," said Mr. Taylor.

沒被抓到過

2009-06-18 10:29
An applicant was filling out a job application. When he came to the question, "Have you ever been arrested?" he wrote, "No."

可惜他不是

2009-06-17 10:12
A big crowd were gathered outside a hotel where a famous millionaire died of a car accident. Among the crowd a young man apparently looked very sad.

有想象力的員工

2009-06-16 09:56
"Well," the young man said, "in your advertisement you said you wanted somebody with imagination."

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